Disclaimers: I do not own Gundam Wing or any of its characters.
Notes: Sally finishes examining Quatre. Quatre finds he needs help dealing with the consequences.
Hope From the Past
Quatre tried to keep his breathing steady, but it was difficult when he was terrified that something was terribly wrong with him.
Sally had left the room in such a rush . . . it was all quite frightening. “You don’t suppose I have a tumor or something, do
you?” He asked, looking to Trowa with widened eyes.
Trowa shook his head, his grasp on Quatre’s hand tightening somewhat. “I don’t know. Her expression was more . . .
confused than concerned.” He smiled a little. “Don’t worry so much about it.”
~Quatre . . . will you PLEASE calm down? You’re starting to make ME ill.~ Duo’s telepathic voice was clear and strong, and
there was an undercurrent of deep concern. Concern that Quatre was grateful for. He may have lost all of his sisters, but he
still had Duo . . . and Duo had been more of a sibling to the blonde than any of those related to him by blood had been.
Quatre took a deep breath. ~I’m sorry, Duo. Sally was just checking me over and then ran out of the room to get something. I
have to admit that I’m worried about what it is.~
“Well, quit it, okay?” Duo smiled weakly from the chair that Heero was pushing into the room. “Hey, Quatre!” The weary
youth said, giving a slight wave.
Something within Quatre relaxed. Sure he’d just been speaking with Duo, but something in him had screamed that it wouldn’t
be satisfied until he saw, with his own eyes, that Duo was safe. He reached out a hand and let the relief he felt traverse the link
he and Duo shared.
Duo smiled warmly as he clasped Quatre’s hand. “I always saw you as a brother too, Quatre.” He said, his consciousness
sweeping through Quatre’s mind, catching now and then on the stronger emotions within Quatre.
Quatre would have said something, however, their attention was drawn to the door as Sally entered with some machinery.
“Sally . . .” Trowa’s voice was soft, but full of confusion. “What do you need an ultrasound for?”
Quatre paled, thinking for certain that there was something dreadfully wrong with him. “Do I have a blood clot or something?”
Sally pursed her lips. “I don’t know.” She walked over and smiled at Quatre before smearing some gel across his bared
stomach. “I don’t suppose you can tone down your powers, can you? If this thing reacts like the x-rays did when you were
first brought here, then we’ll get nothing.”
Duo answered for Quatre. “I can absorb Quatre’s powers into me and use it for something . . .” He looked down at himself
with a sigh. “Maybe I can use it to heal my legs so I can get out of this stupid chair.”
Quatre, though still trembling a little, pouted. “No fair! I thought we were going to wait to heal each other when we were both
Duo grinned at the blonde, sending calm thoughts his way. “I’ll have to do something with the energy I take from you. You
know it’ll overwhelm me . . . I can’t take such an upsurge.” He brushed some hair from Quatre’s face. “You’ll probably be
told to rest for a few days anyway . . . you’ve just been through a lot of stress. And with me healed and resting at the same
time . . . when you wake up, we’ll have enough power together to heal you.” He then laughed at Quatre’s answering raspberry.
Sally chuckled and motioned toward Duo, even as she raised the back of Quatre’s bed so that he was reclining somewhat.
“Please, do what you need to do.”
Duo shook his head as he wheeled his chair closer to where Quatre was now reclining. He smiled back at Heero as the beautiful
young man helped him from the chair to sit at Quatre’s side. Then he turned his eyes back to Quatre, biting into his lip with
worry. They’d only had to do this once before, and that had been when Quatre had twisted his ankle one time before the
Taltheans had captured them.
He took Quatre’s hands and leaned forward so that his forehead touched Quatre’s. Together they breathed, synchronizing
themselves to each other . . . making their tentative connection stronger. And then, Duo opened himself completely and smiled
as Quatre’s power filled him completely. It would drain the both of them to do this, Quatre more than Duo, but they needed to
know what was wrong with the precious blonde.
If asked, Duo would never be able to describe what it felt like to have Quatre’s power flow through his own body. All that he
could say would be that if sunshine could be bottled and drank like an elixir . . . it would stimulate a mere ghost of the sensation
and nothing more. It was bliss, pure and simple . . . a delicate and chaste ecstasy . . . undescribable by the words of man.
True to his word, Duo concentrated their combined powers and used them to rejuvenate his own weakened legs, focusing on
the muscles . . . strengthening them. A part of him was eager to be able to look Heero in the eyes and have a relationship not
based on dependance and pity.
When they were done, Duo gently disconnected himself from Quatre and fell back into Heero’s waiting arms, reality seeping into
his pores and tainting the purity of the light that had filled him so completely only moments ago. He sighed as Heero settled him
back in the chair, Heero’s warm hand laying against his face. “I’m okay . . . it just took a lot out of us.” He opened his eyes
with a wan smile. “Believe it or not . . . Quatre . . . has the stronger powers.”
Heero nodded. “Just relax. Sally’s going to make sure he’s okay.” He assured, his gentle fingers brushing gently over Duo’s
Duo nodded in reply, holding his thoughts together for Quatre’s sake. For his brother, he would force himself to remain
conscious . . . to be here should Quatre ever need anything.
He slowly turned his head to watch as Sally examined Quatre with the ultrasound. The doctor made a few ‘hmm’ sounds and a
few ‘oh’ sounds, but mostly kept everyone in the dark. Finally, Duo had had about enough of it. “What is it? What’s wrong
with him?” He asked, forcing his eyes to remain open just a little bit longer.
Sally let out a soft breath and looked briefly to Duo before turning back to Quatre. Her face was set in a grim repose . . . her
features betraying her worry. “If circumstances were different from what they are, I would say ‘nothing at all’. However . . . I
know for a fact that the diagnosis I have can be taken very badly. This is . . . disturbing . . . to say the least. And I am sorry
that I have to be the one to tell you this.”
Duo took in a breath and held it, worrying for Quatre with every fiber of his being. “What? What is it?”
Sally was silent for a moment, as if steeling herself to deliver terrible news. Then she spoke very softly, but it was loud enough
for everyone to hear. “I don’t know how it’s possible, but Quatre is . . . he’s pregnant.”
A collective round of gasps replied to Sally’s words. Quatre’s eyes widened to the size of saucers . . . and Duo clenched his
hands on the wheels of his chair, anger and horror filling him completely. No . . . this couldn’t be.
Sally was talking again, her words barely registering in Duo’s mind. “I’ll want to scan you, too, Duo . . . now that your powers
are low . . .”
“What?” Quatre’s raspy voice came, filled with such pain and fear that it made Duo’s heart ache in a sympathetic echo. “You
mean . . . those . . . they . . .” His breathing became rapid and shaky as he thrashed his head from side to side, his eyes filling
with unshed tears.
Trowa was quick to go to Quatre, grasping the blonde’s quivering hand and lightly reaching to stroke one eerily pale cheek.
“Sshh . . .” He turned to look at Sally grimly. “Can’t you stop this? Hasn’t he suffered enough at their hands?”
Sally frowned. “I don’t know. I want to make sure that Duo isn’t in a similar condition before we even think of this. Besides .
. . it’s Quatre’s choice whether or not he wants to try ending the pregnancy. It’s best if I scan Duo now. He could be as far
along as Quatre is if he were pregnant as well.”
Duo let the news sink in as Quatre’s whimpers echoed in his ears. Quatre was pregnant . . . he could be pregnant as well. And
since he knew for a fact that neither of them had been intimate with their chosen partners . . . that could only mean one thing.
As Heero lifted him onto one of the beds and Sally began to examine him, he felt tears slide from his eyes. When would their
torture end? Hadn’t they been through enough? He closed his eyes and simply let unconsciousness take him away.
Quatre bit his trembling lip as he looked to the ceiling. Pregnant. He was pregnant. The Taltheans . . . those monsters . . .
Quatre knew they had experimented on him, could vaguely remember the instances when he was not being raped and abused,
but those moments had been few and far between. And his memories weren’t quite coherent. There were lagging gaps, images
of bright lights overhead and cold sterile slabs beneath him. He remembered little . . . he didn’t want to remember anything more.
He felt Duo’s consciousness slipping away and turned frightened eyes to look at the long-haired youth, pain filling his heart as
Duo lost awareness. No . . . he didn’t want to be alone . . . not now.
“Duo . . .” He reached out with both his mental and real voice, only to gasp and shudder as a thick wall seemed to slam down in
his mind. Quatre knew that Duo wouldn’t purposely ignore him . . . wouldn’t shut him out like this. It was an instinctive
reaction . . . his subconscious wanted to protect him, even from Quatre.
Still, Quatre didn’t like the silence in his mind. It only brought back the memories of his years in that hospital . . . of the silence
he had lost himself in. He didn’t want to become that shell again . . . didn’t want to fade away like that.
He whimpered, his body shuddering in fear. Reflexively, he reached out to Trowa, clawing weakly at the taller youth’s arm.
“Please . . . Trowa . . . Duo’s gone. He’s blocked me out.” He whispered, watching as fear flickered in those almost hypnotic
Already, Quatre could feel the darkness lingering at the edges of his mind, the emptiness that wanted to swallow him whole. He
needed something to hold onto, an anchor to keep him within the confines of this reality, no matter how painful it was for him to
Trowa leaned closer, sparing a fleeting glance over to Sally and Heero who had moved back to Quatre’s bedside. “How can I
help you?” Trowa asked, his concern obvious.
Noticing for the first time that Sally was back at his side, Quatre gave the young woman a pleading look. “Is Duo?” He asked,
forgoing his own sanity for Duo’s sake.
Sally’s smile was bereft of joy, her eyes sad as she regarded the blonde. “He’s not pregnant.” She said, a ghost of a smile
coming to her features. “Are you all right?”
Trowa shook his head, answering for Quatre. “He says that Duo’s blocked him out. He can’t hear Duo’s mental voice.”
“He’s protecting himself.” Quatre shivered, digging his nails into Trowa’s arm. “But I can’t stand the silence . . . I don’t want
to go back there again. The darkness frightens me more than this . . . thing I carry inside me.”
“Is there anything we can do to help?” Heero inquired, even as he gave Duo a worried glance. It was obvious that he felt
affection for Duo . . . Quatre could see it, could very well feel the loving emotions flowing off of him.
Quatre turned his gaze to Trowa. “A connection . . . I need a connection . . . an anchor to reality.” He whispered, his eyes
silently pleading with the tall youth. “Please . . . Please?”
Trowa nodded without hesitation. “What do you need me to do?”
Quatre smiled, grateful that Trowa would agree to this. “Give me your hands, or hold me . . . lay your forehead against mine.
The more physical contact there is . . . the stronger the link.” He said, remembering the only other time he had done this . . .
Solo had wanted to experience what Quatre and Duo shared . . . it had been the only way to connect their minds. With Quatre’s
sisters, it had simply been natural . . . with Duo, it had started in dreams . . . with a stranger though, it was always more
difficult to begin.
“Why don’t you take him back to your room, Trowa?” Sally suggested, gently wiping Quatre’s stomach clean of the gel and
closing his shirt once more. “I can do more tests later . . . and I’m certain the both of you need the rest.” She reached up,
brushing her hand over the sore spot on Trowa’s forehead again, easing his hair aside to better see the wound. “It doesn’t look
like it needs stitches . . . and your eyes are clear and focused . . . let me bandage you up, and you’re free to go.”
“Thank you, Sally.” Trowa smiled, waiting patiently as the doctor cleaned and bandaged the wound, sticking a rather ugly
adhesive bandage on his forehead.
“Take care of him.” Heero said, giving Trowa a curt nod. Without further word, he turned and returned to Duo’s bedside,
taking a seat beside the unconscious youth.
Quatre felt disjointed and barely noticed when Trowa picked him up. He let out a soft sigh, curling into Trowa’s embrace,
feeling a sense of security within those strong arms. Quatre closed his eyes, finding himself feeling dizzy. When he opened his
eyes again, he found himself being gently set upon a bed. He didn’t recall dozing, but he must have.
Trowa sat at his side, his graceful fingers sliding along Quatre’s gaunt cheek. “You ready?” He asked, a tinge of fear in his
“I should be asking you that.” Quatre replied, weakly raising his hand to brush across Trowa’s face.
“I’m ready.” Trowa smiled, then shook his head. “But the least I could do is make you comfortable before we do this.” He
reached down, fumbling with Quatre’s shirt before easing it from the weary youth.
Quatre felt a faint tinge in his cheeks, watching as Trowa stripped the both of them down to nothing more than their boxers.
However, he wasn’t afraid . . . he didn’t know why, but he felt nothing but trust for Trowa. The thought that Trowa could hurt
him never even entered his mind.
Trowa slipped into bed beside Quatre, bringing a light sheet to cover their bodies. They lay there beside each other, face to face,
staring deeply into each other’s eyes.
Quatre timidly set his hand on Trowa’s side, biting his lip as he inched his way closer. “H-Hold me . . . and set your forehead
against mine.” He said, drawing in a shaky breath.
Trowa nodded slightly, encircling Quatre in his arms. Quatre had to bite his lip to keep from gasping as he was brought flush
against Trowa’s warm body, the sensation nearly causing Quatre to falter in his intent. But then as Trowa set his forehead
against Quatre’s, the blonde remembered what he was supposed to be doing.
“Close your eyes. Focus on your breathing. Clear your thoughts.” Quatre said, reducing his voice to a mere whisper. He
closed his own eyes, taking long deep breaths and letting them out slowly, shivering as Trowa’s breath caressed his skin.
Quatre only hoped that this would work. He didn’t think he had the strength to attempt it again. If he failed . . . then he’d have
to face the unwavering darkness again . . . perhaps he wouldn’t be able to return this time.
To Be Continued . . .